Leave any intro-lerance at the door.
Have you ever noticed that there is a whole load of songs called “Intro” out there?
If you look a little further into this, you will find that none of the public actually knows what this “Intro” word means, and yet so many artists have put their own spin on this latent “Intro” concept. What can be discerned is that these “Intro songs”, otherwise known colloquially as “Intros”, often appear at the beginning of albums, and can sometimes be fairly short, a lot shorter than what we’d expect of traditionally enjoyable music.
Some dark rumours suggest it could be short for something, perhaps it’s each artists’ “introspection”? Various attempts to articulate the experience of being an “introvert”? Who could know what its true meaning is, but without any further introduction let’s go from the worst to the best on the top 50 tracks titled “Intro”.
50. Intro – De La Soul (From 3 Feet High and Rising)
This just wasn’t even a song! It’s just De La Soul pretending to be in a game show? RIP Trugoy but come on!
49. Intro – Drake (From Honestly, Nevermind)
No Drake here at all, just a saxophone? Didn’t know he could play, but considering he gives up after 37 seconds, you can tell his heart wasn’t into it.
48. Intro – Black Country, New Road (From Ants From Up There)
Just another saxophone one again! There’s at least some rhythmic backing that comes in here, but for a band known for long, sprawling pieces, this again hardly quantifies the required length to be a REAL song.
47. Intro – Calvin Harris (From Funk Wav Bounces Vol. 2)
A nice little harp and a bit of e-piano does not mask the fact that Calvin Harris is slacking hard with his take on the “intro” format. Grow up!
On a much loved and much revered album, Outkast simply play a serviceable instrumental underneath the sound of a woman doing some sex moans. This sound is very alien to the modern-day enjoyers of 2000s hip hop classics, so could be interpreted as a cruel jab from the Outkast duo.
45. Intro – Ezra Collective (From Juan Pablo: The Philosopher)
Here Ezra Collective just lists their individual names. This at least gives the track some utilitarian value, as one could simply listen to this rather than look up their Wikipedia.
Not much to see here, just a couple of guitars. Points for dialing in a good tone.
43. Intro – Limp Bizkit (From Three Dollar Bill, Y’all $)
A guy yells about Jesus for a while. It definitely has atmosphere, but the overly-aggressive tone of his voice makes the takeaway emotion minor stress.
The Limp Bizkit boys set their vocoder to the brown note.
41. Intro – Limp Bizkit (From Significant Other)
The most song-like endeavour Limp Bizkit ever made with their triple endeavour into exploring what “intro” means to them, and yet no elements feel fully committed to. “You want the worst, here’s Limp Bizkit”, why don’t you believe in yourself for a change?
A pleasant little song, though the burp is fairly unnecessary and brings down the rest.
39. Intro – Meek Mill (From Championships)
Out of all the tracks in this list so far, this is the first to commit to a fairly standard song length. Meek Mill’s style is not at all complimented by the choice to rap over In the Air Tonight, that’s probably agreeable without ever having to listen.
Suppose it is quite nice to hear a bassoon on a track. Shout out to bassoons.
37. Intro – Ms. Lauryn Hill (From The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill)
A nice little acoustic guitar here, backed by a teacher reading off a register. Chill enough, but once more that’s just a guy speaking to me.
A cute, very little Disclosure beat. I think the yelling guy is telling us about fire?
35. Intro – N-Dubz (From Timeless)
A very 2018-produced track which was somehow released in 2023. You are not wearing those floppy 808s, the 808s are wearing you.
Bit of yelling here once more. The anger behind this lady’s delivery seems that much more believable to the previous guys yelling “Intro” tracks, sorry fellas!
33. Intro – The Chemical Brothers (From For That Beautiful Feeling)
Quick check, were any of you made aware that The Chemical Brothers had an album out last year? Fun little tape loop experiment, doesn’t quite find a good rhythm to land on before it ends.
Nice reverberant pipe tones. I could see myself making peace with the fact that I will not see the light of day again after getting trapped in a caved-in tunnel to this track.
31. Intro – Shawn Mendes (From Wonder)
Shawn Mendes sings about how you have a million different faces. Like, OK then Sheshanaga. Nice piano here.
What’s up with these kooky guys? I like their vibe!
29. Intro – 21 Savage, Metro Boomin (From SAVAGE MODE II)
Just Morgan Freeman narrating over something. That was kind of already a dead meme by 2015, but a fun enough production base.
Here, we get a clip of a line spoken at the end of The Lawnmower Man (1992), which reminds one of the existence of The Lawnmower Man (1992).
27. Intro – Tinie Tempah (From Disc-Overy)
Tinie Tempah is here and he will not stop talking to you. In a new application of Horseshoe theory, this track is so over-produced it comes around to becoming a little bit charming. Just a little.
Another pleasant enough track, evoking the tone of The Lord of the Rings films. For my own personal taste this is not a benefit unfortunately, as anything which reminds me of those movies reminds me of the food poisoning I had while attempting to watch them.
25. Intro – The xx (From xx)
Guess we’re getting somewhere, but the vibe of this instrumental does make me feel like I am being advertised a SUV with plenty of room for the whole family.
A calming, charming track, once more mired by being only just over a minute long! What’s with these “Intro” things?
23. Intro – Black Star (From Mos Def & Talib Kweli Are Black Star)
A dark piano sample with some dialed-in record scratch work almost disguises that this is another “Intro” track of a guy just talking about something. Nice try.
Short, but a fair amount of drama packed into this piece. Sometimes, you just can’t trade for atmosphere.
21. Intro – Aitch (From AitcH2O)
Far from Aitch at his most developed, but his ability to turn a hook from mid to just about servicable enough is undeniable.
A fleshed-out instrumental, with the guy from alt-J making his most “guy from alt-J” noises yet. Eat a rice cake to this one.
19. Intro – Ludacris (From Theater Of The Mind)
Lovely work Ludacris, thank you very much for this one!
This track does the trick while informing of good security practices, such as not buying Poundland bike locks.
17. Intro – D-Block Europe (From Home Alone 2)
There was another D-Block Europe on this list called Intro which got cut, here is the one that is roughly more capable.
A rare track amongst the “Intro” genre, as unlike many others, this one appears at the end of the album. Interesting! Young Adz sounds like shit here, but everything else works.
15. Intro – M83 (From Hurry up, We’re Dreaming)
Nice one! I liked it!
Can’t lie, never been a fan of Lil Wayne’s flow, but this gets to be this high in the list for the Helen Keller line.
13. Intro – Khalid (From Free Spirit)
A full-fledged and soulful track from Khalid, for what that’s worth. Probably worth at least something, right.
A great DaBaby track, which sounds like every DaBaby track. An artful beat from DJ Kid, well executed on.
11. Intro – Nines, SPESHILL (From One Foot In)
In this one, he says “This one’s the intro”, and we like that folks.
All the standard trip-points of the “Intro” genre are here: it’s short, it’s lacking on the vocals. However, this track is a nice microscopic psych rock groove executed flawlessly! Wow!
9. Intro – Ludacris (From The Red Light District)
Ludacris is just good at making his voice head-bobbable on its own! What’s with that! Witch shit probably!
The best one in the “Intro” subgenre of soulful piano-accomponied renditions. I do wish to be happy and free J. Cole, thank you for asking. Someday, perhaps.
7. Intro – Ghetts (From On Purpose, With Purpose)
A well thought out and impassioned entry, and on this track’s recommendation I will keep refusing to visit Newham.
6. Intro – Lil Yachty (From Lil Boat)
A nice little throwback to the one year Lil Yachty was worth listening to.
5. Intro – JAY-Z (From The Dynasty: Roc La Familia)
A good early Jay-Z track where he says “I move with biscuits”, which I am fairly sure means guns, but it’s very whimsical of him all the same.
A groovy French house track with a bassline which fucks, from the two other French house producers who aren’t Daft Punk.
3. Intro – Ski Mask The Slump God (From Sin City The Mixtape)
The best track from Ski Mask’s exceptionally mid soundcloud throwback mixtape. Say what you will about the rest of it but this is a man who has figured out what “Intro” means to him!
The opener to DMX’s debut album is ominous, brutal, and gives the impression that you have activated DMX as a hidden boss and he will in fact eat all of your Pokémon friends.
1. Intro – C418 (From Minecraft – Volume Beta)
Surprise! This track will induce a state of total mindfulness in you and you have no power to stop it.
That’s it! Here’s the Spotify playlist. I’d go do something else now if I were you.